Lost in Translation: The President's State of the Union Speech

What President Obama said, and what he really meant in the State of the Union Speech: “After a decade of grinding war, our brave men and women in uniform are coming home.” We have snatched defeat from the jaws of victory “It is our generation’s, then to re-ignite the true engine of America’s economic growth; a rising, thriving middle class.” We just raised their taxes 2%. ”It is -- It is our unfinished task to restore the basic bargain that built this country, the idea that if you work hard and meet your responsibilities, you can get ahead ….” If you succeed too well, then you didn’t make it, and fairness dictates we must redistribute your income. “These sudden, harsh, arbitrary cuts (sequestration) would jeopardize our military readiness, they’d devastate priorities like education and energy and medical research.” I’m so brilliant; sequestration was my idea, but the media will blame it on the Republicans. “Most Americans, - Democrats, Republicans, Independents – understand that we just can’t cut our way to prosperity.” I believe government spending is the engine of growth because I am economically illiterate “We’ll reduce taxpayer subsidies to prescription drug companies and ask more from the wealthiest seniors.” Any excuse to raise taxes “To hit the rest of our deficit reduction target, we should do what leaders in both parties have already suggested and save hundreds of billions of dollars by getting rid of tax loopholes and deductions for the well-off and well-connected.” The media never noticed that I stuck many of these tax brakes in the Tropical Storm Sandy Relief Bill. “Deficit reduction alone is not an economic plan.” Tax increases are the economic plan “Let me repeat; Nothing I’m proposing tonight should increase our deficit by a single dime.” I don’t do math “We produce more oil at home than we have in 15 years.” No thanks to me, but I’ll take credit for it “I will direct my cabinet to come up with executive actions we can take, now and in the future,, to reduce pollution, prepare our communities for the consequences of climate change, and speed the transition to more sustainable sources of energy.” If Congress doesn’t enact cap and trade, my EPA will ”So tonight, I propose a ‘Fix-it-First’ Program. I wish I could call it a “shovel ready” jobs program “So, tonight, I propose working with states to make high-quality preschool available to every single child in America.” Even DHS says Head Start doesn’t work, but we need more unionized school teachers “Real reform means strong border security ….” I believe in open borders “Tonight, let’s declare that, in the wealthiest nation on Earth, no one who works full time should have to live in poverty – and raise the federal minimum wage to $9 an hour.” It sounds good, and the resulting unemployed, especially teenagers, will not blame me for the lack of jobs “Today, the organization that attacked us on 9/11 is a shadow of its former self.” I know nothing about Benghazi “Throughout, we have kept Congress fully informed of our efforts.” If you believe that, I have a bridge in Brooklyn for you. “At the same time, we’ll engage Russia to seek further reductions in our nuclear arsenals …. “ In the alternative, I will engage in unilateral disarmament “We must all do our part to make sure our God-given rights are protected here at home. That includes one of the most fundamental rights of a democracy – the right to vote.” My Administration will fight any state efforts to reduce voter fraud that benefits the Democratic Party.