How Do You Know You’ve Become an Old Fogie?
When does the Young Turk become the Old Fogie?
When does the old fogie overlap with the old fart?
Some of us Baby Boomers were talking the other day. The subject arose about when are you an old fogie.
These are signs:
When you have become the institutional memory
When the subtle shift from idealism to realism is complete
When you are comfortable with the status quo
When you used to put your children to bed every night and said “Thank you God,” but now every morning you wake up you say “Thank you God.”
When your adult children start listening to you
When you hear yourself referred to at a family gathering as the crazy uncle or the crusty curmudgeon
When you are close, but not yet, the old geezer
When one morning in bed when you wake up, and your beloved spouse says “You have a gray hair.”
When the race between graying and balding claims a victor
When the slow, inexorable weight gain catches up to you
When all your mentors and advisors have passed on, and you are now referred to as the Senior Statesman, the Elder Statesman, the Mentor, the Guru, the Expert, the Maestro.
When “emeritus” has a nice ring to it
When you have mastered the gentle art of compromise
When you are entitled to senior discounts at restaurants, theatres, and banks
When you are looked to for sage advice
When you go from trying to save the world and solve the world’s problems to instilling wisdom in the younger generation
When you take over 10 pills daily
When you are always the senior presenter
When someone politely asks “How are you doing?” and you respond with an extended medical discourse
When “Back in” becomes part of your vocabulary, as in “Back in my day” or “Back in the good old days”
When the movies and TV just aren’t what they used to be
When your 50th Reunion is looming
When your alma mater takes a keen interest in you
When you’re not yet in your dotage