Friday, February 6, 2015

Oh What A Lucky Man Brian Williams Is

Oh What A Life Brian Williams Has Led. Oh what a lucky man he is. Brian Williams has led an exciting life, far surpassing Indiana Jones. He has crammed several lives in just 55 years. We know his helicopter was shot down in Iraq. We know he drank floodwaters in New Orleans and suffered from dysentery. We know that on the drylands of the French Quarter he watched a body float by in the aftermath of Katrina. We learn that he rescued puppies from a burning fire. Here’s what he was too modest to tell us. He was in the back seat of the Mercedes with Dr. Nancy Snyderman on October 9, 2014 as her assistant fetched the takeout order at The Pleasant Grill. He survived Ebola and is recovering from measles. He was under fire with Hillary Clinton as she landed under sniper fire in Tuzla, Bosnia in March 1996. He was imbedded in Afghanistan when his Humvee struck an IED. He was rescued from World Trade Center I shortly before it collapsed. He was also shot at one night during a NYPD ride-along. He was gassed in Tahfir Square in Cairo during the 2011 Arab Spring. He was a hostage during the January 9, 2015 terrorist attack on the Hypercachet Kosher Supermarket in Paris. He was an infant on the last flight out of Saigon as it fell to the North Vietnamese. He marched in Selma with Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. He sat on the bus with Rosa Parks. He was commuting home the other night on Metro-North 659 through Valhalla, New York. He crossed the I-35W Bridge in Minneapolis right before it collapsed on August 11, 2007. He barely escaped the Banda Acer tsunami in 2004. He survived the recent Trans Asia plane crash. He lost a small fortune to Bernie Madoff. He handed the Olympic Torch. He coached Malcolm Butler on interception techniques. Brian Williams cast the deciding chad in the 2000 Florida Presidential Election. It is no surprise Brian Williams has been diagnosed with PTSD. Brian Williams is now seeking advice from his best friend, Dan Rather.

No comments: