Three highways will lead Rick Rodriguez out of Ann Arbor, I-94, I-75, and U.S. 23. It was Rick’s way or the highway for 3 years. He too will now take that long and winding road.
Will he ever return from the Bowl game? “The answer is blowing in the wind,” but if you ask the extended Wolverine family, “It’s hit the road, Rod, and don’t come back no more, no more.”
At the annual football banquet earlier this week, also known as the football bust, Rich Rod said he wanted to be a Michigan man. As Bob Dylan sang, “It’s all over now,
He’s a good coach, but not a great coach. Great coaches build the scheme around the players. Good coaches force the players to play their schemes. Michigan needs a great coach over the next few years to restore its glory. Rick Rodriguez was the wrong coach at the wrong time for Michigan.
I-75 doesn’t go through Ann Arbor, but if you’re in a hurry to leave, it’s but a short distance. It goes from Michigan to Florida, a route well known to RichRod for all his recruits from Florida.
All three routes will, directly or indirectly, connect to West Virginia where Rich Rod still owns a home. Homeward Bound.
Just follow the song, “Take Me Home, Country Roads.” The 23 and 75 pass through Toledo (Forget that Rodriguez lost to the Toledo Rockets). Take a few days to rest in Columbus, where the Ohio residents will greet him royally, and perhaps sing “Auld Lang Syne.” And then, it’s Goodbye Columbus.
Of course, West Virginia doesn’t want him back so maybe he should head west on the 94. It’s but a short drive to the neighboring Hoosier state. Indiana U is looking for a new coach. The only team Rodriguez has beaten in each of his three years at Michigan is Indiana. He also defeated Notre Dame and Purdue this year, proving Michigan is truly the Champion of the West, the best football team in Indiana. If you can’t beat them, join them.
He could continue into Illinois. He finally beat the Illini this year in a defensive battle: 67-65.The score is an omen. I-67 doesn’t exist yet, but he could pick up I-65 in Gary, Indiana, just east of Chicago, and head South through Indiana, Kentucky, Tennessee, and Alabama to the Gulf. He could consult the BP engineers about the proper response to a blowout, or he could drop out, out of sight anywhere along the way, or perhaps take a slight detour and drop in on Les Miles in Baton Rouge.
Take the year off. Enjoy the buyout. Read the Idiot’s Guide to Football Strategy, especially the chapters on building a defense, special teams, How to Recruit 5 Star Recruits, and the retention of players.
However, Rich Rod is too driven to drop out for a year. In that case he should take the 75 north, through Detroit, the broken Detroit, across the Ambassador Bridge into Canada, and sign up to coach in the Canadian Football League. The CFL plays a wide open offense with no defense. He’ll fit right in.